Elizabethkuhnke's Blog

Establishing a Connection

Posted on: February 23, 2011

Connecting with your listener is essential for developing rapport and producing great results. What do I mean by connecting? Connecting is about treating others with respect, looking for points of commonality, and meeting them where they are in order to take them to where you want them to be. We must look at ways of connecting with people to ensure that we always communicate at our best.

When you think about connecting with others consider your purpose and how you can convey your message through the use of mind set, body language, and word choice. To truly connect, you have to care about your listener, treat them with respect, and meet them where there are. To connect with your listener follow these 3 simple steps:

  •        Be clear and confident. If you are clear about your purpose, confident about your message, and trust your ability to communicate successfully, you’ll be able to present your information in a way the audience can understand. Making your message relevant deepens the connection and holds your audience’s attention. Clarity, confidence and connecting make you and what you have to say memorable.
  •        Be present and listen. Engage with your listeners before your meeting or presentation. Ask them questions. What are their interests or concerns? What are their needs? Addressing them where they are strengthens the connection. Talking about what is important to them means they’ll connect with you and care about what you say.
  •        Be perceptive. Pay attention to your listener. Notice their expressions, voice, and body language. Match their mood rather than usurping it with your own. Connect with them where they are and then take them with you to where you want them to be.

REMEMBER: The point of your communication is to connect with your listener.

TIP: Look at people when you want to connect with them. Establishing eye contact translates as credibility.

TECHNICAL: Research shows that holding eye contact is important to establish a connection. More than 3 seconds can become intimidating, so keep it brief.

CAUTION: Be aware that in some cultures sustained direct eye contact is considered disrespectful.

FINALLY: Authentically connecting with people establishes trust and creates truly memorable positive impact.


  1.        Be clear
  2.        Be present
  3.        Be perceptive 

 The ability to relate and to connect lies at the very heart of any creative use of the mind, no matter in what field or discipline.
– George Seidel

For more information visit www.kuhnkecommunication.com

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